Saturday, June 5, 2010

Things in 3's

I am noticing (in my lengthy time of not blogging) that I keep seeing things in 3's. I often take these as little "signs" to bring me comfort. The girls' garden is flourishing and really producing beautiful pictures and new flowers everyday. This sounds totally non-logical, but I didnt know the weeping cherry tree would actually produce little cherries...not that there are a ton or that I will be harvesting cherries or anything! But I thought that was a neat little surprise to walk out to the other day.

This is actually my 100th post. I wish I had some amazing thing to do for it, but honestly, I do not have the mental or physical energy. As some of you know we are expecting our rainbow grasshopper in just a few weeks and I get sad and happy when looking at the nursery....sad because it's being redone and looks only a little bit like it did for the girls...but happy because they will be incorporated in a mural we are doing (and more) and always a part of our lives. I miss my girls every day, and it shows in everything I do, and I know that's ok.

Tomorrow it will be 1 year and 3 months since my girls grew their wings, the 6th of every month is ALWAYS on my are forever in my thoughts and in my heart every day sweet baby girls, love you.


I was devastated to read of another loss this week within the BLM community, completely heartbroken. All you want to do is cling to hope for Mom's trying so hard to have their rainbow baby, and when that gets crushed you really feel for them....deeply. Please please please send some extra love to Courtney, Mommy to twins ^Logan^, ^Brody^, and little brother, ^Wyatt^. Fly high sweet little Wyatt, but not too far so Mommy can see you.


  1. I love all the things you are seeing in 3s. What a great reminder of your girls. Your weeping cherry has little cherries!? I've never seen any on mine! Hmmmm...

    Happy 100th post!! Thinking of you as the time draws near!

  2. My Dearest Toe Twin,

    The "signs" are beautiful and a perfect fit to honor your girls on this 100th post. You honor them everyday in such beautiful ways and show them such love. *tears* I know that moving forward is difficult, but I commend your efforts :)

    I will be sending you extra love tomorrow, the day that we've shared for all these months. Perhaps our babies will show us a sign tomorrow...I know they will, they always do ;)

    Take care of you sweet friend and know that my life is richer having you in it.

    Love you,
    x0x x0x x0x

  3. Happy 100th post Nan! I really believe in signs and I truly think that all these 3's your seeing is your girls saying hello to their Mama! I will be sending prayers for your friend. *HUGS*

  4. Hi sweet Nan!

    Love your photos .You have so many different flowers in your garden ! its beautiful!
    Grief is a strange thing , it is always with you even if you take steps forward and I guess thats ok .
    I went to my second therapy session two days ago and talked about my grief that never really leaves me even if I try to move forward.
    I was pleasantly surprised that the therapist didnt push me to " get over " things .I was so reliefed to understand that is is ok to feel like I feel.
    I needed to hear that as I have felt pressure to " move on " lately and thought there was something wrong with me that couldnt fully move on but now I think thats ok - I move on when I move on there is no timelimit to it .
    I know I have read that before but I wasnt able to really feel its ok before .
    Now I do and I feel so much happier knowing that it is ok to grieve and that there is nothing wrong with me : ) I think maybe its sthe same fór you: your grief and ÿour joy can coexist .You can feel grief for your girls but joy for what you have now today .
    Sending you big hugs on your 100-post day and thank you for sharing whats on your mind here with us .
    Love Angie

  5. I see things in three all the time too. I love it. Love your photos of all your butterflies and flowers. I so wished we lived closer. You know one day when we all have our rainbow babies and they are a bit older we need to meet somewhere for a reunion in person. Oh how fun would that be! I think we should set the date for Summer 2012. Write it in your calender ;)

  6. Your baby girls are sending their love, how wonderful all the things you are seeing in 3's! Thinking of you Nan and can't wait to hear that your grasshopper has made it here safe! I know what you mean about the nursery. I wont repaint the walls or change the curtains... Its the babies room, but it was Kasey's room that he didn't get to use. So I will leave the blue and add some girly colors, but there will always be a trace of Kasey's room((Hugs))