Friday, May 14, 2010

Hiding Out

I've been hiding out, mainly in my girls' garden, watching all of the pretty blooms in progress. It really is a beautiful place and I am so glad it's there to play in. What I find the most interesting, is how some of the plants are coming up differently this year, as compared to last year. For those of you who have followed this blog for a while, you may remember my post called The Last Flower, but it was the last flower that bloomed in my garden in 2009 before Winter set in. There was only one sole flower that came up and it took until October to even show itself. Since then, I have learned that its called a Maximillian Perennial Sunflower, and that it's supposed to have MANY blooms. Well, this year, it started early, has been taking over a good section of the half moon and has so many buds that I lost count! Here are a couple pics:

I think I will split some of it up and replant some in other places. Its really hardy, and pretty!

As I see more or notice anything else different I will definitely share, you can count on that. I really find so much purpose and so much closeness being out there. I will add more to the garden after our rainbow has arrived safely.


Mother's Day. Just hurt, like for most of us. It went ok, but not without the occasional breakdown. Especially after receiving this:

My Mom gave me some pink geraniums I cannot wait to get planted soon. Thanks Mom, you always remember your beautiful Granddaughters in Heaven, and are always there for me, I don't know what I would do without you. I love you.

Hubby had three butterflies placed in this beautiful floral arrangement that arrived at our house. So when I saw it, I counted out loud "one, two, oh my God did you place three butterflies in there" and then had a meltdown in his arms. I am choked up thinking about it. I miss my girls so much, and it sometimes still hurts like it did a year ago. I can't even believe I can say that 'a year ago'. Those moments are going to hit me occasionally for the rest of my life on earth, and it only reminds me more of how real they were in my arms, of how beautiful they are in my pictures and how much I want to honor and cherish them forever. So to my wonderful hubby, I love you, and thank you for all you do to keep our girls' memories alive, and keep me sane. This was a beautiful and most thoughtful gift...and I get to keep the butterfly garden stakes! xxx

So Happy Belated Mother's Day to all of the beautiful Moms, on earth and in heaven, I am sorry I am so late, I guess I needed some time to process the day. I used to process things so easily, now it takes alot of time....does anyone else feel that way?


Lastly, I would like to share what Jennifer created for her local hospital. Please visit her blog to read a document posted "Important tips for medical personnel in dealing with grieving parents". I plan on bringing this to the nurse manager at our hospital when I bring more tissue donations. Please note, her site has pictures and a living child mentioned, so if you have a hard time with those, then please email me and I can email you the document if you want.

Sending you all some Spring butterflies and sunshine.

Love, Nan xxxooo


  1. What beautiful flowers in your garden and also in the Mother's day arrangements so lovingly picked out for a special mom. *hugs*

  2. Sounds like a beautiful spot to hide in.
    Love all the flowers you received. Always keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

  3. I just burst into tears at the flowers. How beautiful. My MIL always gives me a gift from Nick, Sophie, and Alex on Mother's Day. It really warms my soul.

  4. Oh the sunflowers *tears*, but know they make me smile...they are spreading LOVE <3

    So wonderful that your Mother remembered you with the beautiful geraniums..she is so sweet. And, Mike, how thoughtful that he honored you with the butterfly stakes from your touching, beautiful honey. Sweet Daddy :)

    I too feel like it takes much longer to process things these days. I have to think, re-think, process, absorb and then maybe (if my head is in the right place) I can make a decision.

    Much love to you my Angel on Earth,
    your toe twin

  5. Oh Nan, all of the flowers are so beautiful!

    I hope you're feeling well and lil babe is doing well too.

  6. hi nan, the sunflowers are so beautiful i hope they just keep on spreading love throughout your garden! its lovely to see that you have loving people around you, i'm coming in to winter now here in tasmania, but i am preparing some new garden beds getting them ready for the spring. it is so rewarding and healing. loads of love to you xxx anne

  7. Hi Nan <3
    Love your flowers in the garden reminds me of sunshine : )
    Glad you got so many beautiful flowers on Mothers day : )
    I love your efforts to help other babylost mums at your local hospital .It takes strength to do that ,I admire you for planning to hand óver the document on how to help babylost parents .
    Sending you lots of love always , Angie

  8. Hey Nan! If i had your garden i would hide out there too! Sending you hugs and lot of love.

  9. I love the garden! Glad that you can go out there and hang out with your girls. ((hugs)) Hide out as much as you need to!

  10. Thinking of you- especially on Mother's day and everyday- and as for 'hiding out' in your girls' garden... I can't think of a better place to spend time!
    Sending Hugs-

  11. Love how your garden is coming along. Looking forward to more pics. :)

  12. I remember that flower! It's def got more this year!

    I love the pink geraniums. And they smell good too!

    That is so sweet the bouquet had butterflies in it!

  13. SO gorgeous, Nan!!! I'm thinking I woudl definitely hide out there, too----
    thinking of you always!!!!