Six years ago today was the beginning of the end. They were still safely tucked away at this point. We had no way of knowing that losing a mucous plug and back pain was something a nurse, who was told by a doctor, would tell us to stay home for unless "we felt" the need to be seen. Of course, saying it is the beginning of the end is all purely based on my own formed opinion, since I do not have any medical background, but also by having poorly guided medical care...and my trio baby girls were my first pregnancy, let alone being triplets! Five days later, they were born. I have had 6 years of therapy to work this out, and honestly, I've just now gotten to a point where I can say I've almost taken away the "should have could haves". How many things we would have done differently had we known. You still wonder though, but there is nothing you can do now so you have to try to work it out or you will torture your mind forever.
So to try and make an effort this week to stay positive and busy, we've been working on our local hospital tissue box donations for bereaved parents. Doing good in your children's names and teaching others about them is one of the most healing and rewarding feelings. Letting others know they are not alone is they only way to give back right now for us, but it gives us some purpose.
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If you've found this blog because of our tissue donations, welcome, and please click on the links to your right. If you are a long time follower and supporter, thank you, thank you for all you have done to walk and continue to walk this with us. I come here when I need to find peace and sort out my thoughts, which is a bit selfish these days, but everyone is different, everyone's needs are different. My babies have taught me that its ok to do what I need to do for me and for my family. I wish the same for all of you reading as well.
Love, Nan
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