Will I ever stop counting these dates in my head? Four months already have passed and it makes me think, 'was I even close to having babies that would have lived?'. Four months ago I was 20 weeks *sigh*. Four months ago I was happy, until labor started. Four months ago we were getting excited to find our the genders of our precious angels. When do the thoughts stop? I suppose never.
Also, EDD of a forty week term is coming on July 24th, one I would have never made even with a successful pregnancy, but it sticks in our heads like glue.
I know alot of you are going through what I am, and I understand your pain and am sorry you have to feel this hurt. I pray for all of our hearts to be a little less heavy someday. I want to get to the point of integrating our babies lives into our everyday life without the sadness of it all. I want to feel happy when I think of them. For the most part I do, but not always. Keep doing things to remember your angels and writing your thoughts down so they do not get stuck in your head all day.
Love you baby girls, forever your Mommy xo
3 days ago