Saturday, September 26, 2009

Their Tree

She is beautiful, and I refer to the tree as a "she" because she is graceful, pretty and her branches lean over almost protecting the earth around her. Protecting my angels. She is getting ready to winterize herself as the leaves are slightly turning colors. Protecting herself from the cold of Fall and Winter to come. Sound familiar to anyone? It is us, the babylost Mom world that I never knew about, and now know all too well. This garden has taught me many things, most of all patience. Earlier this Summer I was afraid of anticipating the tree losing her leaves. Now I look at it as a form of protection and it brings me to a better place, easier to "see".

On a separate note, why is it still so hard to hear of others' joy for their pregancies IRL? I want to run and hide whenever I hear anything related to baby clothes, birthing stories or even see newborns? Such a crappy feeling. Guess I am getting ready to shed my own leaves and protect myself too.

Hugs to all, Nan xo


  1. Hugs back to you, Nan. The tree (she) looks perfect. I think it's a wonderful way to look at it. That's all we can do.... protect our hearts.


  2. ((((HUGS))) to you Nan. It is so hard for us to hear of IRL pregnancies because it is such a reminder of what we should have, but don't, and that just hurts. Thinking of you with love. xx

  3. She is very beautiful...just like your angels. Nan, I too still do not like to see pregnant women or little newborns. I know I have lost it. You are completely normal for feeling this way...COMPLETELY understandable. Many, many hugs to you my friend.

  4. I agree, she is beautiful. I can't wait to have a house with a yard so I can plant a special tree too.

    It is hard for me to deal with IRL pregnancies, too. I get really angry, jealous, bitter... It's not pretty. But, that's where I'm at. Hang in there!

  5. I absouletly love the tree, she is beatiful. Our garden has brought much peace to me this summer as well. I find myself connecting with Zoe when I am lost in my garden...and I love when I see little butterflies fluttering around. You garden is beautiful.

    I too have a hard time with IRL pregnancies...I waiver back and forth with it all the time. For me, I am simply jealous. I think it's normal.

    Hugs to you!

  6. Hang in there- she is beautiful! (the tree)- It's been six years since we lost one of our twins and today an old friend stopped by with his 9 month old twin girls... (unexpected) If he told me one more time about how he gets stopped because of his 'twins' I thought I would smack him! As for the thing about pregnant people... I feel the same way- even when I've been pregnant... wrote about it here...
    Thinking of you!!

  7. what a stunning tree. So many hugs for you xx

  8. Nan- And oh I FINALLY updated the butterfly blog. Sorry it took so long. Please let me know what you would like me to add under each of their pictures.

  9. Nan,

    Continue to shed those leaves. It's all part of the healing process. All things evolve over time. You are on your way and this is your "moment".

    Love to you today, tomorrow and always. May sunshine reign on you.

  10. What a pretty tree! What kind is it? I want to start a garden for my daughter but I will have to start small. I want the first thing to be the tree though.
    I feel the same way when I see baby clothes or hear of newborns. In a way I am dreading halloween because I want my little girl here with me. Such a childrens holiday. It is hard and I think we all go through it. I hear in time it will get easier ... Big Hugs!